You Are Ethically Obligated to Inform Me of Your Bigotry

So, this ethics writer at the New York Times thinks all trans people are required to disclose as much on a date.

Personally, I think cissexist idiots should be required to disclose their transphobia on a first date, that way I know right then and there that this person isn't someone I want to waste any more of my time on. That seems much fairer to me, since any kind of -ism is legitimate grounds to not want to get involved with someone that doesn't have a basis in fear and bigotry.

See, the thing is, there's this pervasive, fucked up idea that transpeople's bodies are common property. That they don't have a right to privacy, because they're not "normal" and, as everyone knows, people who are normal have a right to know about, gawk at, and pass judgement on that kind of shit. That's how the world works, doncha know? If you're different, you better be prepared to drop trou, strip down, and let the whole world take a damn good look.

It's all about cheap fucking thrills at the expense of human beings by a society that already does just about everything it can to shit on them, other them, and make life just about as hard as possible. And this panic and insistence on disclosure comes from cispeople realizing, hey, transpeople come in all shapes and sizes, colors and genders, classes and places and there is no magical detection radar that lets the cis known when they come within five feet of one of us.

Basically, it comes down the fact that whatever I've got hanging out in my pants is no one's goddamn business but my own. There are a lot of reasons why I do and don't let others know, but the key point to remember is that they're my reasons. And, honestly, that should be the end of it.